What do you think when you look at this picture?
I can tell that you're thinking what I'm thinking: it's a picture of an old fashioned couple, probably taken around the 50s. But why we call it old fashioned? It's probably because of what the boy and the girl look like. They are dressed up in a modest and formal way. If we saw a young boy wearing a tie on a date today or a girl with a similar hairdo, we would probably make fun of them.
However it's not only about their appearance. What they do, drinking a juice from the same glass, is also somewhat old fashioned nowadays. Actually, in the modern culture, many people would find such a date kinda weird.
Is it though?
I think it's not weird, but it's actually different. The way we date nowadays has nothing to do with how people used to date.
Let's see some major differences:
1) The styling.
As mentioned before, 50s people used to take care of their looks before going on a date. They had to be dressed up in a formal way. Especially girls should be really beautiful, but not sexy. These days, things have changed. Being sexy is really important not only for girls but for guys too. A nice look is and was required, but nice differs from time to time. Today we can go on a date with a casual look, but, still, we have to be stylish and sexy.
2) The romance.
Many older people say that the romance is gone nowadays. Things such as buying flowers or other small gifts for your crush don't exist today. Of course, some stereotypes such as the impression that the man should always pay were completely wrong in my opinion. But, other than that, we still need a little bit of romance in our relationships. Romance is not a taboo, it is a sign of affection that should be mutual for both genders.
3) The kindness.
Many years ago, people used to respect one another. Your boyfriend would come and pick you up from your house, even if you lived far from him. It's a part of romance too. In addition, in the 50s it used to be principle for people to say: oh, when can I see you? Or, when could I call you? Rather than just assuming they can at any point. These all were signs of kindness.
4) The place.
The place where two people meet each other is related with the type of fun each person prefers. Nowadays couples go to the movies or for a drink. About 60 years ago, people would go to an amusement park, even though it seems strange and childish today. They would also go dancing, but not at a club. They then had the discos, where the music was completely different - and, in my opinion, nicer.
5) The communication.
Well, that's the most important. And that's because some years ago there was no internet, no facebook, not even mobile phones! It seems like it was harder to meet someone, but actually it was easier. People didn't hide behind their pc, but they actually used to talk with each other in person. When a couple was in a long distance relationship, there was no Skype nor Viber; they used to write letters to each other instead! It was a little hard, but it was mysterious and romantic.
Even sex was different in the 50s and 60s. Monogamy was really important, while, nowadays, people can do whatever they want in their sex life. Another difference is that sex was almost forbidden on the first date. People were really conservative, which, let's admit it, was bad. However, the fact that sex was't the only important thing in a relationship was beautiful.
7) The serious relationship.
A serious relationship today doesn't necessarily lead to a marriage. You can live happily with your partner for as long as you want and under the terms you want. In the 50s, things were completely different. Most relationships ended up in creating a family.
8) The time.
I mean the time someone spends with their partner. I think our grandparents were better than us in that. The fact that there were no smartphones and no internet was good for a couple, because they used to spend their time together qualitatively.
In conclusion, I believe that both eras have their advantages and their flaws. What is better today is the fact that people are free to do what they want with their relationships. In addition, nowadays women and men are equal and intependent. However, the lack of romance and the obsession with technology really harms modern relationships.
Either you're in a modern or in an old fashioned relationship, this could help you figure out if your story can last.
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