IN-Q’s The Only Reason We’re Alive: A Poem About Love

Why the reference to age matters

The embedded performance is titled The Only Reason We're Alive. The line about not waiting until eighty-five gives its reflection a concrete horizon. A distant age becomes a way to ask what we are postponing now. Read that as a poetic invitation, not a deadline by which anyone is supposed to find a partner or achieve a particular kind of life.

There are several ways to respond to that invitation. It could mean telling a friend that their help mattered, thanking a relative for something specific, or making time for a conversation you keep putting off. These possibilities do not depend on romance. They also leave room for someone whose important relationships are friendships, family ties or a wider community.

Make appreciation specific enough to be heard

Instead of aiming for a grand declaration, name an action and its effect. “You stayed on the phone when I needed company” says something different from a general compliment. It tells the other person which moment you remember. A written note can work just as well as a spoken one, especially when it gives the recipient time to take it in without having to produce an immediate response.

Expressing affection is an offer, not a demand for the same words in return. Choose a form of contact the other person welcomes, and respect any boundary they have already set. The poem's urgency need not become pressure on someone else. A small, considerate gesture can carry more meaning than a declaration made mainly to relieve your own sense of unfinished business.

After listening, finish this sentence privately: “One thing I appreciate and have not said clearly is…” If an appropriate recipient comes to mind, decide how you would like to express it. If no message needs sending, the reflection can still help you notice which relationships you want to give more attention.