Originally published 2020-07-07.
Can being good-looking hold you back? Occasionally, yes, but only in specific situations. Most research finds that attractive people enjoy small advantages on average, from first impressions to pay. A handful of studies, though, show that beauty can also trigger envy from rivals and may be linked to less stable relationships. Two of those studies, by psychologists Maria Agthe and Christine Ma-Kellams, are often summed up with the cheerful claim that you might be single because you are too attractive. The real findings are more interesting, and more limited, than that headline.
The usual story: beauty helps
For decades, social psychologists have documented a "what is beautiful is good" bias. In a classic 1972 study by Karen Dion, Ellen Berscheid and Elaine Walster, people assumed that more attractive strangers were also kinder, more successful and happier. This is a form of the halo effect: one visible positive trait colours our view of everything else about a person.
The bias shows up in the real world too. Economists such as Daniel Hamermesh have reported a modest wage gap in favour of better-looking workers, and studies of teaching evaluations, elections and court decisions have found similar small effects. Appearance can shape how people are judged in hiring, friendship and dating.
So the starting point is that attractiveness is, on average, an advantage. The interesting question is when it stops being one.
The Agthe study: when evaluators feel threatened
In 2011, Maria Agthe, Matthias Spörrle and Jon K. Maner published three experiments in the journal Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin under the title "Does Being Attractive Always Help?" Participants reviewed applications for jobs (Studies 1 and 3) or a university place (Study 2), each with a photograph of a more or less attractive candidate.
The pattern was consistent. When the candidate was of the opposite sex, attractive applicants were rated more favourably. When the candidate was of the same sex as the evaluator, the advantage reversed and attractive applicants were rated less favourably. This held for both men and women.
Why? In the first two studies, the effect was linked to whether evaluators wanted to interact with the candidate or would rather avoid them. In the third, it depended on the evaluator's self-esteem: people with high self-esteem did not mark down attractive candidates of their own sex. The authors concluded that the negative reaction reflects a sense of personal threat, as if the attractive candidate were a potential rival.
Some popular write-ups of this research said it was less attractive evaluators who penalised attractive applicants. That is not quite what the paper reports: the key moderating factor in the published study was the evaluator's self-esteem, not their looks.
The Ma-Kellams study: looks and lasting relationships
A second line of research looked at romance rather than work. A team led by psychologist Christine Ma-Kellams, of the University of La Verne in California, published four studies in the journal Personal Relationships in 2017.
- Yearbook photos: Researchers rated the attractiveness of 238 men in high school yearbooks from the late 1970s and then checked public records of their marriages and divorces over roughly the next 30 years. More attractive men tended to have shorter marriages and were more likely to divorce.
- Celebrities: Among about 130 well-known actors and other public figures, those rated more attractive had shorter first marriages.
- Attention to alternatives: In further studies, more attractive people in relationships reported more interest in other potential partners, and were less inclined to downplay the appeal of attractive alternatives, especially when they felt less satisfied with their current relationship.
The idea is that people who know they are desirable may notice they have more options, which can make a relationship more vulnerable during a difficult patch. Note what this does and does not say. It is about the stability of existing relationships, not about why someone is single.
What the studies cannot tell you
Both projects are careful pieces of research, but they come with clear limits.
- Correlation, not cause. The marriage studies show an association. They cannot prove that good looks themselves shorten relationships; other factors, such as lifestyle, career or social circles, may be involved.
- Narrow samples. The yearbook study covered men from two high schools, and celebrities live unusual lives under constant public attention.
- Subjective ratings. Attractiveness was judged from photographs by coders, which is a reasonable method but captures only one moment and one set of tastes.
- Small, average effects. Findings describe trends across many people. They do not predict what will happen to any individual.
- Lab settings. The selection experiments used fictional applicants. Real hiring panels have more information, and often more accountability.
Combining the two lines of research into "your beauty is why you are single" stretches both. Neither study looked at how often attractive people find a partner in the first place.
Common myths about attractiveness
Myth: Attractive people have it easy in every area of life. Usually they enjoy a small head start, but research like Agthe's shows that the same feature can provoke rivalry, and attractive people can be stereotyped as vain or less competent in some settings.
Myth: Being very good-looking explains being single. Being single has many causes, including timing, priorities, location, personality and simple choice. There is no evidence that looks are a main driver.
Myth: Beauty is a fixed, objective score. Ratings vary between observers and cultures, and things like warmth, humour and familiarity change how attractive we find someone over time.
Practical takeaways
If you make decisions about other people, at work or in study admissions, these findings are a reminder that appearance can push judgments in either direction without our noticing. Some well-tested habits help:
- Remove photos from applications when they are not relevant to the role.
- Use structured interviews, with the same questions and a scoring sheet for every candidate.
- Include a mix of people on selection panels and compare ratings before deciding.
- Notice your own reactions. If you feel uneasy about a candidate, ask whether it relates to the job or to comparison with yourself.
In relationships, the useful lesson is about commitment rather than looks. Couples who invest in the relationship, talk openly about dissatisfaction early and choose to focus on their partner tend to do better, whatever they look like. And if you are single, there is no need to read anything about your face into it. The research simply was not designed to answer that question.
Sources: Agthe, Spörrle and Maner (2011), "Does Being Attractive Always Help?", Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin; Ma-Kellams and colleagues (2017), Personal Relationships, summarised by Pacific Standard; Wikipedia, physical attractiveness.
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